Category Archives: Uncategorized

On our family’s darkest day when we had no hope and an uncertain future…. God knew.

Ben knows what people are saying and has read the comments on posts and articles from individuals we considered friends.

I knew it was time for me to be completely vulnerable in my writing. In hopes, that just like she inspired me, maybe I can inspire you to do the same…. break down the mask, the façade, the walls and just let the good, bad, and ugly show.

Ben is the one who taught me to give grace and love others over myself. He has always had a heart for people and been able to extend grace and forgiveness so easily.

Ben is an alcoholic (when one can no longer control their use of alcohol, compulsively abuse alcohol, despite its negative ramifications), maybe you struggle with pills, porn, erotic books, gambling, an eating disorder, etc.

He pushed me away, isolating himself and I truly was at a loss in how to be his wife. It was a roller coaster of ups and downs during this time. What remained and how we got back here was Ben’s self-focused behavior. It was about his needs, wants, desires and we were just living in his world.

“But I will sing of your strength: I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning. For you have been to me a fortress and a refuge in the day of my distress.” Psalms 59:16 Alcoholism is not something I personally have ever dealt with, but I have loved an alcoholic. It tookContinue reading “Loving an Alcoholic”

This is exactly where I find myself, not knowing what to do. How do I make up for the broken promises, lies and hurtful words/actions with my wife, children and others? How do I go about seeking forgiveness and making amends?

Psalms 34:4- I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Isaiah 41:10- Fear not, for I am with you: be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. What is fear? WebsterContinue reading “FEAR…”

Disappointed and angry with myself is more like it. Angry I let three plus years of sobriety go by the wayside because of my selfish desire to have a drink by ignoring everything I learned entering recovery in 2016 and convincing myself I wasn’t an alcoholic anymore, that somehow I could relax with a drinkContinue reading “Impossible to comprehend is probably an understatement…”